Title: Decisions
Author: Jo. R
Rating: All ages.
Category: Sam/Jack, fluff
Spoilers: None really. Inspired by Atlantis S5 speculation.
Summary: Sam makes a decision
Authors Note: Short, fluffy and kinda odd, but something that wouldn't leave me alone.
It was the both the hardest and the
easiest decision she'd ever made. Hard because she'd come to care about the
people she was leaving behind, because she knew logically that the decision to
leave wasn't necessarily the best decision to make for her career.
Easy because it was the only decision
her heart would allow her to make.
For eleven years, she'd put her life
on hold. Sure, she'd tried to find a balance between love and duty, between
happiness and honour. It hadn't worked. She'd found one of the nicest, most
understanding men in two galaxies and still it had failed.
Pete hadn't been enough for her, and
had shown her that no one else but him
ever would.
Leaving the SGC, leaving Earth...
That decision had really been made for her. It was what her superiors wanted,
what the career minded side of her brain said she should do.
It was what he'd wanted, because he'd been so damn proud of her and wanted to
give her as many chances as possible to shine in her own right.
The decision to come back from that,
to return to Earth where she'd have a pretty cool job but less of a
command-orientated one to what she'd become used to... That decision was hers, and hers alone. She'd the IOA to keep him out of the
loop for as long as possible and they had; they'd fought her long and hard
about it, though, maybe thinking that he'd be able to talk her out of it when
their own attempts had proved fruitless.
Saying goodbye had hurt. She'd become
close to most of the people who served underneath her, to Colonel Sheppard and
his team in particular. Even Rodney McKay had become someone she thought she
could call a friend, though she swore to herself she'd never tell him that –
although she was reasonably sure he was over whatever fixation he'd once had,
she didn't want to say or do anything that might risk it making a comeback.
She'd spoken to them all on an individual basis, said goodbye to Teyla in the
new nursery in the Athosians quarters, Rodney in his
lab, Doctor Keller in the infirmary and Ronon in the gym. She'd said goodbye to
John on the balcony and promised she'd make sure he got regular shipments of
the latest football games on DVD.
And then she'd left, stepping into
the wormhole that seemed to embrace her like an old friend, welcoming her home
even before she stepped foot on the ramp at the SGC.
SG-1 had been called to the Gateroom, their reunion sweet but not as personal as she'd
have liked. She'd endured Vala's enthusiastic hug,
returning it with one of her own and promising the dark haired woman they'd get
together for a girls only day soon. She'd embraced Teal'c and felt tears spring
to her eyes at his quiet murmur that he was pleased she had returned. She'd
hugged Cameron, rolling his eyes when he asked if she'd come to get the band
back together and she'd slipped easily into Daniel's arms, a comfortable
silence enveloping them as they stood together for countless seconds just
sharing a moment that no one else could have.
"Does Jack know you're
here?" Daniel had been the one to ask as she'd known he would be, taking a
step back to look her in the eye. He'd grinned knowingly at the blush that
stole across her cheeks as she shook her head, a mischievous glint in his eye
that took her back at least three years. "I didn't think so."
It didn't take long for the group to
move somewhere a little quieter or for Sam to get them all to promise not to
tell the absentee General that she was back. She spent as much time as she
could with them before they left to embark on the mission her arrival had
delayed and she embarked on her own journey to Washington DC.
The office was standard, as far as
offices in the Pentagon went. She'd seen quite a few of them in her time
stationed there and the only thing that stood out in stark comparison with
those in her memory was the prim and proper looking woman who sat at the desk
in front of the door to General O'Neill's office, the one who glared at her
over tortoise shell rimmed glasses when she dared enquire if the man himself
was available.
"General O'Neill is a very busy
man," the woman told her haughtily. "You should have made an
appointment."
Sam fixed a smile on her face,
refusing to let the intimidating woman see that she'd annoyed her. Where had
the young, peppy Lieutenant she'd spoken to on the phone just over a year ago
gone? He'd been nice, even if he had been suffering from an intense case of
hero-worship where the original members of SG-1 had been concerned. "Could
you just tell him I'm here? If he then decides he's too busy to see me, I'll go
without a fuss."
The matronly woman she'd decided to
call the Dragon in her mind opened her mouth as if to protest then pursed her
lips as though she'd eaten something sour. "I suppose I could do
that." The corner of her mouth turned upwards ever so slightly as an evil
gleam appeared in her eyes. "The General doesn't tolerate
interruptions."
"I'm sure he doesn't." Sam
turned her own smile up a notch, fighting the urge to press the button on the
intercom herself. "Now if you could just tell him I'm here..."
Dragon-lady slowly picked up the
receiver and put it to her ear, her bony fingers hovering over the button that
would connect her to the phone just a few feet behind the closed door.
"And whom shall I say is interrupting his day?"
"Colonel Samantha Carter."
If she'd been expecting a reaction, some kind of recognition, Sam would've been
disappointed.
Dragon-lady smirked, the look on her
face curiously pitying and her finger pressed down lightly on the much-used
button. "General O'Neill," she began after a moment, " I'm sorry to interrupt, Sir, but there's a Colonel
here to see you. No, Sir, there's no appointment in your diary... A Colonel Carter, Sir, Colonel Sam—Oh."
The receiver was replaced slowly, as
though the woman was in shock. She glared almost accusingly at Sam but before
she could speak, the door to the connecting office swung open.
And there he was.
Sam smiled nervously, hands clasped
in front of her as her eyes greedily drank in the sight of him. His hair was
mused, the top button of his shirt undone. She stared and stood still whilst his own eyes trailed over her, studying her from head to toe
before slowly making their way back up to her face.
"Hey." She unclasped her
hands and let them fall to her sides, kicking herself internally as the ability
to be eloquent deserted her.
"Carter. Sam." The
confusion on his face gave way to a slow grin, his body taking an almost
involuntary step forward. "Did I know you were going to be here...?"
She smiled and took a small step
forward herself, only half-aware of the disapproving look on Dragon-lady's
face. "No." She bit her lip and squared her shoulders. "The IOA
asked me to tell you that you need to find a new commander for the Atlantis
expedition, Sir. Seems they thought you'd take it better coming from me."
The confused look was back, joined by
a thin thread of surprise. "You're not going back?"
Unable to speak passed the lump that
rose in her throat, Sam shook her head and clasped her hands again, fingers
wrapping together as she stared at him and willed him to understand. "I
hope you're not disappointed..."
"Dis...
Disappointed?" He took another step forward, hands reaching out to cover
hers. The grin that spread over his face was a typical Jack O'Neill grin but
still created butterflies in the pit of her somersaulting stomach. "That's
the stupidest thing you've ever said," he muttered, tightening his hands
around hers as his eyes searched her face. "Are you sure, Sam...? Don't do
something you're gonna regret..."
"No regrets, Jack. Not about
this." She managed a tremulous smile when one of his hands left hers to
touch her cheek, a look of wonder on his face. "I missed you," she
admitted quietly, blue eyes locking with brown. "I don't want to wait
anymore. I want... I want us. I want there to be an us."
The grin returned in full force,
joined by a softness in his eyes that she'd come to love seeing there. Love and
miss since her transfer to Atlantis. "How can I be disappointed with that?"
It was a rhetorical question. She
smiled at him, the nerves dissipating into anticipation. Jack grinned back. She
didn't know how long they stood there, holding hands, grinning like idiots at
each other but it soon became apparent that it'd been too long for
Dragon-lady's liking.
"General O'Neill, Sir, your next
appointment..."
"Cancel it." His eyes never
left Sam's as
his thumb stroked her knuckles in slow, soothing circles. "Cancel all of
my meetings. Today and tomorrow."
"But Sir... You can't... What
should I say...?" Sam risked a glance at the other woman, the corners of
her lips twitching at the aghast look on her face. She
almost felt sorry for her – almost, but not quite as Dragon-lady soon fixated
on her with an accusing glare. "It isn't appropriate, Sir..."
Jack shrugged, his gaze leaving Sam's
face for a brief moment. "Can't say I'm caring about
that." He tossed his secretary a quick, boyish grin. "Just do
it, Martha. Tell 'em whatever you want." He
tightened the hand still wrapped around Sam's and started tugging her with him
towards the outer-door of the small reception area. "I'll be back on
Thursday. Maybe. I'll call ya."
She let him pull her out of the
office and into the hallway but her sense of decorum returned with the bustle
and noise of day to day life at the Pentagon. Reluctantly pulling her hand away
from his, Sam met his raised eyebrow with a shy smile, quickening her pace so
she could walk beside him, meeting his long strides with her own.
Easy or hard, Sam reflected, glancing
at the man beside her only to find he was glancing at her, leaving Atlantis was
going to be the best decision she'd ever made.
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